This crate is special.
Its contents are unknown and requires a
RoboCrate Key to unlock.

The RoboCrate contains Unusual effects that will only come from this crate.

You need a Mann Co. Supply Crate Key to open this.
You can pick one up at the Mann Co. Store.

You need a Mann Co. Supply Crate Key to open this.
You can pick one up at the Mann Co. Store.

You need a Mann Co. Supply Crate Key to open this.
You can pick one up at the Mann Co. Store.

You need a Mann Co. Supply Crate Key to open this.
You can pick one up at the Mann Co. Store.

You need a Mann Co. Supply Crate Key to open this.
You can pick one up at the Mann Co. Store.

Way way more ghastly.

This snappy all-class stovepipe commemorates man and monkey's joint attempt to conquer the heavens with a built-in rocket that, every year on the anniversary of the launch, might violently explode.

You never took a break from cp_foundry, and now you can prove it with the actual steam whistle used to call the breaks you never took!

Celebrate the Demo's most serious childhood injury with this gruesome mask based on his missing, haunted eye.

Brown paper never looked so mildly disturbing.

He had one all along...

This terrifying (innocuous) witching cap was found by the all-powerful (mediocre) wizard Merasmus in the depths of the Hades Spiral (right near the entrance of the Hades Spiral).

Turn routine melee attacks into environmental hate crimes with this adorable mask.

Express your undying hatred for the living.

Be the Big Man of Christmas with this fur-fringed pom-pom hat!

Celebrate Canada's birthday, on whatever day that happens, with this commemorative Canadian Prime Minister's ceremonial dress hat.

Frostbite of the ears halts blood flow, and leads to tissue death, gangrene, and infection. And nobody wants to look at your gangrenous infected ears. Cover up those frostbitten abominations with these stylish earmuffs.

'If ye gaze upon one tome-themed badge this year, MAKE IT NOT THIS ONE!' - Merasmus the Magician'

Harness the seductive black magic of Hollywood with this commemorative clapper board—the same used by actual movie directors. Now YOU can tell Ryan Reynolds what to do!

This badge tracks your duel statistics.
Increase its level by winning duels!

Even though you were late to the party, you were still the life of it.

Give your teacher the gift of insight, paper clip and rubber band included.

Your Mann Up progress through Operation Steel Trap is saved on this badge.

Enter a world of imagination that's far superior to the crap-ass worlds of imagination you get from books. Pyrovision lets you see the TF2niverse from our favorite arsonist's perspective.

The perfect winter accessory for those times when your holiday fun escalates into a high-casualty firefight. 90% more blood-absorbent than any other scarf on the market!

The carpets will run red with enemy blood thanks to this dapper Second Annual Saxxy Awards ensemble.

Nothing says "Happy Holidays" quite like prickly leaves and poisonous berries pinned to your chest.

Oh my goodness! Is it Balloonicorn? The Mayor of Pyroland? Don't be ridiculous, we're talking about an inflatable unicorn. He's the Municipal Ombudsman. Between you and me, Balloonicorn's a joke down at City Hall. Gary Brottman, the inflatable Sewer Superintendent, is sleeping with Balloonicorn's wife. Anyway, when he's riding around on your shoulder don't mention ANY of this to him, because Balloonicorn is on a hair trigger and he's usually pretty drunk.

When used, this Action Item drops a crate
on up to 23 other people on the server!

Don't leave your friends hanging.

This is a press-and-hold taunt. Hold down the action slot key to remain in the taunt's pose.

Share a good natured laugh with everyone except that one guy you just shot.

Applies a bonus effect for a limited amount of time when used. Must first be filled at an Upgrade Station and can only be filled with one bonus type at a time.

Builds Hype as you run. When the Hype Meter is full, unleash mini-crits!

Builds Hype as you run. When the Hype Meter is full, unleash mini-crits!

Mann Co.'s latest in high attitude
break-action personal defense.

Players heal 60% of the damage done
to an enemy covered with milk.

The ultimate in semi-concealed weaponry.
There's no question you need this gun,
the only question is: where will you keep it?

While under the effects, +25% movement speed and damage done and damage taken will be mini-crits.

These lovely festive ornaments are so beautifully crafted, your enemies are going to want to see them close up. Indulge them by batting those fragile glass bulbs into their eyes at 90 mph.

We gave peace a chance. It didn't work.

Custom decals can be applied to this item.

We gave peace a chance. It didn't work.

Custom decals can be applied to this item.

Winds of Gravel Pit
Scout brings on his fan!
You are marked for death

Getting hit by a fish has got to be humiliating.

So nice of the Spy to lend an arm...

Spiky end goes into other man.

Getting hit by a fish has got to be humiliating.

Getting hit by a fish has got to be humiliating.

Everyone knows that speed is a Scout's best friend. Why weigh yourself down with bulky hats when you can break the sound barrier without them?

It's as if this hat fell off the tiny metal head of a dirt-stained urchinbot selling robonewspapers in 1899 Mecha-London, rolled through a time tunnel and into your modern backpack.

You'll be batting a thousand (skulls in) when you don this red piece of plastic!

Straight outta control point.

Stick it to Major League Baseball by not wearing their hat the right way.

Don't shoot the messenger. Actually, go ahead and try. Can't be done, pal! Too fast!

This commemorative sweatband is a loving tribute to the heroes – and we don't use that word lightly – who live their lives like sweaty candles in the wind.

These steel-toed dogs were scientifically engineered (in a wind tunnel) by America's foremost authorities on mouth-kicking to perfectly fit the inside of an idiot's mouth.

Show balls who is the boss.

That item was originally a make-believe superhero accessory tie-in to an imaginary soft drink enjoyed by a fictional character. Now it's also made of metal. There are so many layers of abstraction going on here even we don't know what to make of it.

Walkin' down the street to the hardcore beat while his Mann Co. boom vibrates the concrete.

Read a book – or at least look like you can – with this vintage educational ensemble. Be the B.M.O.C. (Big Mouth on Campus) of your own make-believe Ivy League!

For a brief stint in high school, Scout joined the track team in one of his many schemes to pick up girls. He was kicked off the team after three days when everyone realized he was 23-years-old and also not enrolled in the school.

Each scoped headshot decreases the weapon's charge time.
A scoped body shot or miss reduces the bonus.

Heads will roll.

Experience the vicarious thrill of the tough-talking, dame-seducing gumshoe by reading the collected works of Raymond Chandler. Then take a break from all that and try on this novelty-sized cartoon dog hat.

This is the best hat. We couldn't say it if it weren't true. This one's the best.

These pint-sized pain proxies combine the erotic mysticism of Haitian voodoo with the stultifying boredom of math.

A special no-damage rocket launcher for learning
rocket jump tricks and patterns.

With buff, some damage
Dished out by nearby teammates
Comes back as healing

Provides a defensive buff that protects
nearby team members from crits
and blocks 35% of incoming damage.
Rage increases through damage taken.

Provides an offensive buff that causes
nearby team members to do mini-crits.

Provides an offensive buff that causes
nearby team members to do mini-crits.

Soldiers and Demos
Can duel with katanas
For a one-hit kill

Make Spanish history come alive with this authentic conquistador's helmet, excavated from the actual grave of a sixteenth century French cosplayer.

You can't tell, but he's furious.

This purely cosmetic battlefield awareness accessory will fool everyone from the lowliest private to the mayor of the army into thinking you're probably in the army too.

This hat has mean written all over it.
(Note from Legal: This hat has nothing written on it.)

Let's see you do that again, Private.

Combining the sublime pageantry of Tchaikovsky's "Nutcracker" with the bold futurism of Tchaikovsky's "Robot Nutcracker vs. Tarzan".

Protects cranium from bullets and shrapnel.
Also heats soup.

A nameless hat for a nameless man.

A Haiku for war.
To defeat one's enemies.
Honor the crocket.

The grand achievement of
Victorian military fashion.

Our lawyers say 'YES! YES!'

Throughout the history of civilization, the white beard has come to symbolize wisdom and status. Show the world it's possible to be bearded AND stupid with this Heavy- and Soldier-specific face-nest. Shove it, civilization!

Throughout the history of civilization, the white beard has come to symbolize wisdom and status. Show the world it's possible to be bearded AND stupid with this Heavy- and Soldier-specific face-nest. Shove it, civilization!

Keep little healing man close.

Just a like the Soldier's actual grenades, these shiny glass baubles are purely ornamental.

Given to those few brave soldiers whom stood guard valiantly without sleep, nourishment, or a social life.

Do the snow-pants dance with this stylish holiday ensemble from famed Arctic designer Kristoff Kringle.

Amaze your friends! Impress women! Walk with a limp for life! It's grotesque!

Alt-Fire: Gain increased attack power by
charging toward your enemies.

A special no-damage stickybomb launcher for learning stickybomb jump tricks and patterns.

Your enemies will think you're making peace, right up until the terrifying moment that their hand is very seriously cut! Here's the trick: It's a broken bottle!

High-yield Scottish face removal.
A sober person would throw it...

High-yield Scottish face removal.
A sober person would throw it...

Hoist the mainsail! Buckle those swashes! Get into a swordfight! Pirate captains yell stuff like this all the time, and now you can too.

One-eyed Scottish drunk
Dons his helmet for battle
Blacks out, misses war

Witch-hunting: necessary, but time-consuming. What if we told you you could burn up to five witches a day without lifting a finger? Introducing the Pure Tin Capotain, the greatest time-saving invention since the electric can opener.

Own this one-of-a-kind piece of memorabilia from the classic ‘70s film "Blaxton Hale vs. Black HAL 9000".

This brimless bonnet cap comes equipped with a satellite pom-pom that streams up-to-the-minute news relevant to the on-the-go Scotsman (golf scores, whiskey prices, when "Braveheart" is on).

If you pause that big fight scene in the classic film "Swinging Fists of Future Hercules", you can tell that's not actually famous robot actor Kirk RoboDouglas, but a cyborg stuntman. Support the unsung heroes of the silver-plated screen with this limited edition stunt helmet.

For the first time in history, batteries are included with your purchase of Demo's battery Bandolier. Because, well, you're purchasing batteries. We should have said, for the first time in history [except for all those times you bought batteries].

Demo is already a lot like Santa Claus. They both have extensive knowledge of modern explosives, they both hate Judy Garland, and now, they can both sport a charming beard and corn cob pipe.

Originally owned by some punk kid in Syria, this Arabian wish-granter is a lamp full of liquid courage. Simply rub, think liquory thoughts, and pour. Warning: don't think about anything else while rubbing, or you might not get booze.

This shoulder-mounted feathered friend comes in any color you like, and is so full of whiskey it couldn't fly off if it wanted to. Great to have around if you decide to eat it—just turn your head and bite!

Your enemies will clap in delight at the cartoonish innocence of these old-timey bombs, making it that much sweeter when you blow their arms off.

Remember that time you met the wisest robot in the world? And tore his beard off and stole his stupid pipe? Because the police are here and they want to talk to you.

Bundled with a broad selection of eyeball-related movies ("Eyes Wide Shut", "The Hills Have Eyes, Part II" and three more) that your friends can enjoy from the comfort of your face.

Movement speed increases based on ÜberCharge percentage to a maximum of +10%

Can't overheal.
Move at the speed of any faster heal target.

ÜberCharge provides 75% resistance to a selected damage type. You are healed for 25% of the matched incoming damage on your heal target.

'Do no harm.'

Made from genuine German rabbit fur, this military-grade trappers' hat makes the perfect complement to the Officer's Ushanka. Let the officer in your life know you'll always be right behind them, with a Medigun at the ready and a matching wardrobe.

Scrub in... things are about to get messy.

Look like you know what you're doing when you pronounce people dead.

Remind those ungrateful bastards how valuable your Medic skills are by striking a heroic pose accompanied by an angelic choir, beams of divine light, and a flock of doves.

While under the effects, move speed is increased,
damage done and taken will be mini-crits,
and the player may only use melee weapons.

Who needs bread?

Be the life of the war party with these laugh-inducing punch-mittens.

Be the life of the war party with these laugh-inducing punch-mittens.

Roast this steel ushanka in the fire and place it on your head for sustained warmth throughout the day. Make sure to come up with an impressive sounding fake anecdote for your third degree burns!

Chop wood. Eat syrup. Live in Canada. This hat lets you do it all.

Commemorate history's greatest robot Canadians with this knitted steel cap. Former Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau! Optimus Prime Minister! Commander Data from the hit CBC drama Deep Space Prince Edward Island!

Make sure you never throw in the towel, even accidentally, by keeping it nice and close, where it can't run off and surrender like a coward when you're not looking.

Toting around a 150-kilogram minigun gives those forearm muscles a nice workout. Show them off with these rolled-sleeved shirts, in your choice of argyle, lumberjack, rugby stripe or vertical pinstripe.

Commemorate the age-old tradition of pummelling your opponents senseless on ice by sporting the stylish and practical hairdo of goons and enforcers worldwide.

The shirt and tie let enemies know you're all business. But the short-sleeved vest tells them you're the kind of businessman who can't find a suit jacket that covers your huge guns.

Wrestling's real, and now you can prove it.

The handle of this hand-forged survival knife is crammed with all of the things you'll need to survive in the wilderness, i.e. a pack of matches and three raisins.

Keep sandvich safe with sandvich safe. Okay, is good, no more description. Buy.

Being a revolutionary appliance capable of awakening the fire element phlogiston that exists in all combustible creatures, which is to say, all of them.

Being a device that flouts conventional scientific consensus that the molecules composing the human body must be arranged "just so", and not, for example, across a square-mile radius.

Alt-Fire: Detonate flare.

Being a boon to tree-fellers, backwoodsmen and atom-splitters the world over, this miraculous matter-hewing device burns each individual molecule as it cleaves it.

Improves upon Mother Nature's original
design for volcanos by increasing portability.
Modern science is unable to explain exactly
where the lava is coming from.

Like all identical twins, you were born from a cyst in your sibling's neck, grew into an evil head, and eventually sloughed off your twin in your own exact duplicate body. Now you can't tell each other apart! Take out the guesswork with this identifying demonic skullcap.

Finally live your life like a candle in the wind. (Wind not included.)

Help your enemies celebrate Day of the Dead by wearing this hat and then killing them.

"And it seems to me you lived your life / with a lightbulb in your head / wishing you had cleaned the hole / as the cephalic tetanus spread." – Elton John (words by Bernie Taupin)

Learn the secret that firefighters guard fiercely: There is no better hat to wear while entering a burning building than a metal hat. Why? The metal will absorb 100% of the heat, leaving your bare skin cool and refreshed, probably.

When that robot selflessly gave you its hand, it assumed you'd study it to advance the field of prosthetic medicine. Sucker. Hey, everybody check me out! I'm a metal chicken! Beep beep gobble boop!

Friends and loved ones will call you stupid for wearing this hat. "Hey, moron!" your mother will say. But they won't think it's so funny when you win the Backwards Swimming competition at the Olympics, and are later stripped of your medal for cheating.

When you were a kid, all you wanted was to play the bongos. But then you grew up and, like all of us, realized you're not as good at bongos as Matthew McConaughey. Well, guess what, pal: Nobody is, or ever will be. (Equips Pyrovision.)

'Burn him with fire!' 'No, burn him with fire, then hit him with an axe!'

Your BFFs (enemies) will turn their frowns upside down (confront their own mortality) as they dance a merry jig to (run in terror from) these cheery tunes (soul-destroying funeral dirges). (Equips Pyrovision.)

Are you the personification of death? Do you need to spraypaint something indoors? This skull-shaped rebreather has you covered.

Start off with low health
Kill somebody with this knife
Steal all of their health

It's the perfect gift for the man who has everything: an icicle driven into their back. Even rich people can't buy that in stores.

If looks could kill, this dapper fellow would make your head an accomplice to murder.

Go incognito as a handsome man and enjoy the secret benefits of the exceptionally attractive. High-paying jobs! Erotic encounters! Free bread sticks at the Olive Garden! Eat as many as you can, though, because eventually the mask will rot off, leaving you uglier than before.

A gentleman always has a flower handy to drop on an opponent's grave.

It's casual business up front, and more casual business in the back. Now: check those sides. Yep. It's casual business there too. Cover all the casual business bases with this unbuttoned suit jacket.

Trick your enemies into thinking you are the doorman at a classy hotel. By the time they get wise, you'll be miles away with their car and luggage, rummaging through their clothes and laughing at them.

Being an innovative hand-held irradiating utensil capable of producing rapid pulses of high-amplitude radiation in sufficient quantity as to immolate, maim and otherwise incapacitate the Irish.

Take manual control of your Sentry Gun

I'm gonna lay you out!

Being a tool that eliminates exertion by harnessing the electrical discharges of thunder-storms for the vigorous coercion of bolts, nuts, pipes and similar into their rightful places. May also be used to bludgeon.

Mock the sun with streaks of flame as the UV rays bounce harmlessly away from your eyeballs.

Robo-future history comes alive! Pretend you're a grizzled, cantankerous robot prospector, drunk on teeny-tiny shots of nano-whiskey in the Olllld Cyber-West during the Great Battery Rush of 3047.

If you're a rugged coal miner like us, you know the value of throwing away your mining equipment and mining in the nude so people know how tough you are. Finally there's a version for the office worker to not wear while nudely analyzing spreadsheets.

Most hats are made of felt, canvas or other non-durable cloths that decompose after a mere 10,000 years. The Timeless Topper's built for the long haul, with an outer layer of scrap titanium and an inner core of plastic bags, foam cups and disposable diapers.

Using modern super-deluxe resolution graphics!

This tiny robotic bear used to be the President. Now he lives in your pocket. How could the mighty have fallen so far? [makes drinking gesture] Glug glug wink wink.

No need to hang this stocking over the mantle. It's already stuffed. Thanks for nothing, Santa.

A fantastic name for a fantastic buddy.