TF2B retired
1 Scout
Head
Genuine Robot Chicken Hat
Level 10 Hat - CD Key
Why did the chicken REALLY cross the road? To get hit by a car, stolen by a mad scientist, and transformed into a terrifying cyborg that you can wear on your head. So the next time you hear someone telling you that joke, set that smug joke-teller straight, because you've got the FACTS.
Misc
The Stereoscopic Shades
Level 20 Glasses - Purchased
If you close an eye, one of the teams will disappear. So don't do that.
  • Uncraftable
Flunkyware
Level 54 Apparel - Crafted
This matching henchman's boots, belt and pocket combo lets you run away from things, keep your pants up and carry what's left of your dignity at the same time.
  • Crafted by Mister Turtle
Primary
Baby Face's Blaster
Level 10 Scattergun - Gifted
  • 40% more accurate
  • On Hit: Builds Boost
    Run at up to double speed at maximum Boost
  • -30% damage penalty
  • 35% slower move speed on wearer
  • Boost resets on jump
Secondary
The Winger
Level 15 Pistol - Traded
  • +15% damage bonus
  • -60% clip size
Melee
Unremarkable Sandman
Level 15 Unremarkable Bat - Found in Crate
  • Alt-Fire: Launches a ball that stuns opponents
  • -15 max health on wearer
  • Kills: 17
Action
Taunt: The Director's Vision
Level 5 Special Taunt - Achievement
Equip this item in your Action Slot and press the Action button to tell your victims you are making a Replay of their pathetic demise to share with everyone.
  • Untradable
2 Sniper
Head
The Bloodhound
Level 85 Hat - Achievement
Experience the vicarious thrill of the tough-talking, dame-seducing gumshoe by reading the collected works of Raymond Chandler. Then take a break from all that and try on this novelty-sized cartoon dog hat.
  • Untradable
Misc
5824
texture
Clan Pride #5824
Level 20 Medallion - Crafted
Because it's cheaper and less painful than a tattoo.

Custom decals can be applied to this item.
  • Crafted by Mister Turtle
  • Craft number: 5824
Tux
Level 65 Mascot - Timed Drop
Linux represent!
  • Untradable
Primary
The Machina
Level 5 Sniper Rifle - Timed Drop
  • On Full Charge: +15% damage per shot
  • On Full Charge: Projectiles penetrate players
  • Cannot fire unless zoomed
  • Fires tracer rounds
Secondary
SMG
Level 1 SMG
Melee
The Frying Pan
Level 5 Frying Pan - Purchased
Action
Taunt: The Director's Vision
Level 5 Special Taunt - Achievement
Equip this item in your Action Slot and press the Action button to tell your victims you are making a Replay of their pathetic demise to share with everyone.
  • Untradable
3 Soldier
Head
The Team Captain
Level 75 Hat - Purchased
Our lawyers say 'YES! YES!'
  • Uncraftable
Misc
Lord Cockswain's Novelty Mutton Chops and Pipe
Level 88 Facial Hair - Purchased
  • Effect: Genteel Smoke
  • Uncraftable
323
Flair! #323
Level 20 Flair! - Crafted
Show enthusiasm! For your favorite things!

Custom decals can be applied to this item.
  • Crafted by Mister Turtle
  • Craft number: 323
Primary
Server-Clearing Black Box
Level 5 Server-Clearing Rocket Launcher - Found in Crate
  • On Hit: +15 health
  • -25% clip size
  • Kills: 3360
  • Dominations: 9
Secondary
The Buff Banner
Level 5 Battle Banner - Traded
Provides an offensive buff that causes
nearby team members to do mini-crits.
Melee
Vintage Equalizer
Level 10 Pickaxe - Timed Drop
  • Damage increases as the user becomes injured
  • Blocks healing while in use
Action
Taunt: The Director's Vision
Level 5 Special Taunt - Achievement
Equip this item in your Action Slot and press the Action button to tell your victims you are making a Replay of their pathetic demise to share with everyone.
  • Untradable
4 Demoman
Head
Genuine Samur-Eye
Level 1 Hat - Steam Purchase
One-eyed Scottish drunk
Dons his helmet for battle
Blacks out, misses war
Misc
Genuine Menpo
Level 1 Mask - Steam Purchase
Discover the exciting world of the samurai! Speak quickly and angrily! Grow facial hair! Maybe if you kill another samurai and apologize after, you'll get to date his wife! The possibilities are endless!
Tux
Level 65 Mascot - Timed Drop
Linux represent!
  • Untradable
Primary
Uncharitable Grenade Launcher
Level 1 Uncharitable Grenade Launcher - Found in Crate
  • Kills: 117
Secondary
Strange Chargin' Targe
Level 10 Strange Shield - Found in Crate
Alt-Fire: Gain increased attack power by
charging toward your enemies.
  • +50% fire damage resistance on wearer
  • +40% explosive damage resistance on wearer
  • Kills: 0
Melee
Uncharitable Eyelander
Level 5 Uncharitable Sword - Traded
This weapon has a large melee range.
Gives increased speed and health
with every head you take.
  • No random critical hits
  • -25 max health on wearer
  • Heads Taken: 113
Action
Taunt: The Director's Vision
Level 5 Special Taunt - Achievement
Equip this item in your Action Slot and press the Action button to tell your victims you are making a Replay of their pathetic demise to share with everyone.
  • Untradable
5 Medic
Head
61
The Weather Master #61
Level 63 Hat - Crafted
They called you INSANE when you claimed a helmet with foam clouds and lightning taped to it would give you weather powers! Now you'll show them! You'll show them ALL! Moo hoo ha ha ha! (This helmet does not give you weather powers.)
  • Crafted by Mister Turtle
  • Craft number: 61
Misc
Couvre Corner
Level 20 Pocket Square - Timed Drop
Sometimes we put some jokes in these descriptions. But, no joke: This looks good. Really sharp.
Dr. Whoa
Level 15 Shirt - Purchased
  • Uncraftable
Primary
Scarcely Lethal Syringe Gun
Level 1 Scarcely Lethal Syringe Gun - Traded
  • Kills: 31
Secondary
Mildly Menacing Medi Gun
Level 1 Mildly Menacing Medi Gun - Traded
  • Ubers: 65
  • Kill Assists: 285
Melee
Scarcely Lethal Bonesaw
Level 1 Scarcely Lethal Bonesaw - Found in Crate
  • Kills: 27
Action
Taunt: The Meet the Medic
Level 5 Special Taunt - Purchased
Remind those ungrateful bastards how valuable your Medic skills are by striking a heroic pose accompanied by an angelic choir, beams of divine light, and a flock of doves.
  • Uncraftable
6 Heavy
Head
2498
The Cockfighter #2498
Level 10 Hat - Crafted
Let all those chickens on the battlefield know you're one bad clucker with this paintable all-class rooster helmet.
  • Crafted by Mister Turtle
  • Craft number: 2498
Misc
Professor Speks
Level 5 Hat - Earned
Give your teacher the gift of insight, paper clip and rubber band included.
  • Untradable
The Apparatchik's Apparel
Level 83 Shirt - Found in Crate
Toting around a 150-kilogram minigun gives those forearm muscles a nice workout. Show them off with these rolled-sleeved shirts, in your choice of argyle, lumberjack, rugby stripe or vertical pinstripe.
  • Style: Investor
Primary
Server-Clearing Minigun
Level 1 Server-Clearing Minigun - Traded
  • Kills: 3433
Secondary
The Sandvich
Level 1 Lunch Box - Traded
Melee
Unremarkable Fists
Level 1 Unremarkable Fists - Found in Crate
  • Kills: 14
Action
Taunt: The Director's Vision
Level 5 Special Taunt - Achievement
Equip this item in your Action Slot and press the Action button to tell your victims you are making a Replay of their pathetic demise to share with everyone.
  • Untradable
7 Pyro
Head
2498
The Cockfighter #2498
Level 10 Hat - Crafted
Let all those chickens on the battlefield know you're one bad clucker with this paintable all-class rooster helmet.
  • Crafted by Mister Turtle
  • Craft number: 2498
Misc
The Last Breath
Level 13 Hat - Purchased
  • Uncraftable
Genuine Deus Specs
Level 10 Glasses - Steam Purchase
Primary
Face-Melting Backburner
Level 10 Face-Melting Flame Thrower - Traded
  • 100% critical hits from behind
  • +150% airblast cost
  • Kills: 1040
Secondary
The Flare Gun
Level 10 Flare Gun - Timed Drop
Melee
Unremarkable Back Scratcher
Level 10 Unremarkable Garden Rake - Found in Crate
  • +25% damage bonus
  • +50% health from packs on wearer
  • -75% health from healers on wearer
  • Kills: 14
Action
Taunt: The Director's Vision
Level 5 Special Taunt - Achievement
Equip this item in your Action Slot and press the Action button to tell your victims you are making a Replay of their pathetic demise to share with everyone.
  • Untradable
8 Spy
Head
Noble Nickel Amassment of Hats
Level 16 Hat - Found in Crate
Some hat towers come from humble beginnings, clawing their way to nobility one hat at a time. Other hat towers, like this one, just have rich dads who are the Chief Business Development Officer at Hewlett Packard.
Misc
Genuine Distinguished Rogue
Level 1 Apparel - Steam Purchase
This coat does so much of the heavy lifting to make you look like a sophisticated man of espionage, you won't need to wear anything else at all. Watch those heads turn the next time you attend a fancy gala completely nude except for a coat. So jealous. How about that guy calling the police? Is HE jealous? Yeah he is.
The Dapper Disguise
Level 98 Mask - Achievement
Go incognito as a handsome man and enjoy the secret benefits of the exceptionally attractive. High-paying jobs! Erotic encounters! Free bread sticks at the Olive Garden! Eat as many as you can, though, because eventually the mask will rot off, leaving you uglier than before.
  • Untradable
Secondary
Unremarkable Revolver
Level 1 Unremarkable Revolver - Traded
  • Kills: 10
Melee
The Spy-cicle
Level 1 Knife - Found in Crate
It's the perfect gift for the man who has everything: an icicle driven into their back. Even rich people can't buy that in stores.
  • Silent Killer: No attack noise from backstabs
  • On Hit by Fire: Become fireproof for 2 seconds
  • Backstab turns victim to ice
  • Melts in fire, regenerates after 15 seconds
Pda
Disguise Kit
Level 1 ...Cigarette Case?
Pda2
The Cloak and Dagger
Level 5 Invis Watch - Timed Drop
  • Cloak Type: Motion Sensitive
  • +100% cloak regen rate
Building
Sapper
Level 1 Sapper
Action
Taunt: The Director's Vision
Level 5 Special Taunt - Achievement
Equip this item in your Action Slot and press the Action button to tell your victims you are making a Replay of their pathetic demise to share with everyone.
  • Untradable
9 Engineer
Head
Texas Tin-Gallon
Level 96 Hat - Found in Crate
It's a historical fact that in cowboy times, cloth was hard to come by. Creative cowpokes kept the sun out of their eyes by making hats out of what they had in abundance: sheet-metal trees and bolt cactuses.
Misc
Genuine Pip-Boy
Level 10 Armband - Steam Purchase
Using modern super-deluxe resolution graphics!
Genuine Deus Specs
Level 10 Glasses - Steam Purchase
Primary
Somewhat Threatening Frontier Justice
Level 5 Somewhat Threatening Shotgun - Found in Crate
  • When your sentry is destroyed you
    gain revenge crits for every sentry kill
  • -50% clip size
  • No random critical hits
  • Kills: 79
Secondary
The Lugermorph
Level 5 Pistol - Achievement
The ultimate in semi-concealed weaponry.
There's no question you need this gun,
the only question is: where will you keep it?
  • Untradable
Melee
Wicked Nasty Wrench
Level 1 Wicked Nasty Wrench - Found in Crate
  • Sentry Kills: 594
  • Kills: 102
Pda
Construction PDA
Level 1 PDA
Pda2
Destruction PDA
Level 1 PDA
Building
PDA
Level 1 PDA
Action
Taunt: The Director's Vision
Level 5 Special Taunt - Achievement
Equip this item in your Action Slot and press the Action button to tell your victims you are making a Replay of their pathetic demise to share with everyone.
  • Untradable