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The Steam Pipe
Level 1-100 Pipe
Just like steampunk ruined reading, the steampipe destroys the harmless pleasure of smoking by tarting it up with a lot of bolts and dials and Nikolai Teslas. Comes with period-appropriate Gary Oldman Dracula glasses!
The Bearded Bombardier
Level 1-100 Facial Hair
Demo is already a lot like Santa Claus. They both have extensive knowledge of modern explosives, they both hate Judy Garland, and now, they can both sport a charming beard and corn cob pipe.
  • Style: Whatever
  • Styles: Whatever, Formal
The Waxy Wayfinder
Level 1-100 Hat
Finally live your life like a candle in the wind. (Wind not included.)
Soldier's Sparkplug
Level 1-100 Cigar
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. Other times it is a sparkplug. Sometimes it is a boot. The important thing is that you have something in your mouth that is on fire.
Soldier's Stogie
Level 1-100 Cigar
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. And sometimes, as is the case with this hand-rolled Soldier cigar, it's gravel, manure, human hair, and taco seasoning wrapped up in old band-aids.
The Bubble Pipe
Level 1-100 Hat
Being an invention that achieves the humanitarian goal of all great men of science, from Lord Holland to the Duke of Wellington, to allow a true gentle-man to smoke a pipe in space.
The Gentle Munitionne of Leisure
Level 1-100 Hat
This snappy all-class stovepipe commemorates man and monkey's joint attempt to conquer the heavens with a built-in rocket that, every year on the anniversary of the launch, might violently explode.
The Outback Intellectual
Level 15 Apparel
Argyle. Pipe-smoking. Individually, they make you look like an idiot. Together, they make you look smart AND stylish! Just like Umberto Eco!
The Bomber Knight
Level 1-100 Hat
Lord Cockswain's Novelty Mutton Chops and Pipe
Level 1-100 Facial Hair
  • Style: Helmet
  • Styles: Helmet, No Helmet
Aladdin's Private Reserve
Level 1-100 Mystical Lamp
Originally owned by some punk kid in Syria, this Arabian wish-granter is a lamp full of liquid courage. Simply rub, think liquory thoughts, and pour. Warning: don't think about anything else while rubbing, or you might not get booze.
The Nine-Pipe Problem
Level 1-100 Pipe
In the time it takes you to read this description, I've already ubered a heavy, captured your base, solved a crime, and smoked three pipes.
  • Style: Afternoon
  • Styles: Afternoon, Evening
Cheater's Lament
Level 1 Aura of Incorruptibility
Though some would stop at nothing to achieve hats, you remained resolute and incorruptible in your quest for head decorations. For that, you have been rewarded.
  • Style: No Hat
  • Styles: No Hat, Hat
  • Untradable
The Backpack Broiler
Level 1-100 Barbeque
I've got your back... steaks.